the goal of speech / so obnoxious to reach

make your mark this time
this journal is semi-friends only. what does that mean? it means that the majority of my entries will be public. anything that's not will be overly personal, locked to specific people, etc. you're not missing much if you're not reading that, seriously.

want to be friends?Collapse )

... i like how the list sort of degenerated.

stickied anonymeme

i've given all i can
IP logging is off, anonymous commenting is on, comments are screened.

This post will be sticky'd in the near future, as a permanent anonymeme of sorts.

If you have any confessions you'd like to make, anything you've been wanting to say or vent about, about anything (me included), you can comment here and say it.

I won't reply (though I can, if you'd like, just ask), and no one but me will ever hear about it.

[addition: if you need to talk, too -- not vent or rant, but you're upset or depressed or, hell, just need to talk -- this is open for it. anonymous if you'd like, i don't care. i don't even have to know you! if you want or need to talk, i'd like to listen.

blatantly stolen from angeling, besides the addition.]

Jan. 18th, 2011

make your mark this time
Pick a character I write, and I will give you the top five ideas/concepts/other I keep in mind while writing that character that I believe are essential to depicting them accurately. Includes both fandom and original characters.

WHY AM I DOING THIS. I don't even remember what characters I used to play aside from Axel and Acacia soooob.

... I think the main reason is to get people whose characters I like who haven't done this to see it and do it. SO DO IT.

Tags:

Jan. 17th, 2011

you just pack up your things and move on
sup, kids!

I still ... never have anything to say here. Still totally disconnected from fandom, still not RPing anywhere, still barely even talking to anyone. The only things I have to say about my life are bipolar-related, which are, frankly, depressing and not actually interesting to anyone but me. I miss actually having an internet presence, but I don't really know how to do that anymore.

... But Resonance of Fate is an awesome game! I've gotten used to the battle system and now I adore it (CROSS THE BLUE LINES GO GO GO HERO ACTION SHOOT HIM IN THE FACE).

oh oh oh and I want to cosplay for Comic-Con (if registration ever opens lolol) but I ... have no idea who to do. There's really not that many people I can pull off with being Persian. siiiigh.

AND ALSO I GOT A NEW DOG.Collapse )

... okay, so I guess I have more to say than I thought.

Dec. 13th, 2010

make your mark this time
Holiday Love Meme

Because it's really not the holidays without me complimentwhoring.

Also, this is a fantastic post about suicide and mental illness. Happy Christmas... !

Tags:

Dec. 7th, 2010

a way to measure the distance
so I said I would do a post. AND I WILL.

I signed up for classes! I actually signed up for classes a week before everyone else— I got into the Disabled Student Services program, hooray for the system working in my favor. I have to take ... 27 units (yes I know) for transfer reasons, and I honestly don't want to go into the whole thing right now because it'll stress me out, but suffice to say that is a lot of classes. The vast majority are easy-A online classes (lol "Introduction to Health") that I've cross-referenced on RateMyProfessor. I'm a little concerned about the two bio and art history classes, but I need them for transfer requirements, sooo what can you do.

I feel kind of awful right now, to be honest. I've been depressed for the last week or two, so I think I need to get my Lamictal upped. whiiich means a trip to the psychiatrist, which means another $110 charge! Or I could just take my usual one pill and then half of another, considering that's what he'd prescribe, anyway. I'm making myself miserable over tiny little things, and everything's spiraling into one big ... miserable spiral. of misery. I want to just fall asleep and not have to be awake and feel like this, which is usually the number one sign that, yep, it's the ol' bipolar acting up again.

misery misery misery. trying to think of things that don't make me unhappy. um.

... I really can't think of anything. wow. okay. uh—

OH RIGHT Golden Sun: Dark Dawn. oh my god guys golden sun. so. much. nostalgia. It's exactly like the first two, which means not particularly good but very pretty and decent gameplay and your party is basically GS1 2.0, except Jenna has blue hair and wind psynergy and Ivan's been replaced with an annoying little nerdball. I'm up to ... the underground city thing! I have no idea, I don't even read the text half the time (which I realize totally diminishes the appeal of Golden Sun) and I'm chilling with Piers's illegitimate son and waiting for Alex to show up again and be politely douchey.

OH AND ALSO: I sent my computer to be fixed about two months ago, and now they've finally told me they're, uh, not going to do it, but here have the $700 you spent on it in the first place! Any suggestions for new ones in the $700-$800 range? I'd prefer laptops that are at least decent for gaming.

Dec. 4th, 2010

something distinctly ungood this way
HI WORLD. I've started about six entries over the last month and deleted them for being Too Boring. Because I am Too Boring. I saw How to Train Your Dragon and that is pretty much the most exciting thing that has happened to me ever. oh and Harry Potter was v. good.

But! It occurs to me! I was looking at Comic-Con thingamajigers and it occurred to me that some of you guys are going, too (if registration ever happens ...). I know it's, uh, about six months in advance, but is anyone thinking about it yet? And does anyone want to be hotel buddies ...

Sep. 13th, 2010

ah'm a genie in the boootttlleee
SO, UM. SUP, GUYS.

It's only been, uh ... oh man since the fucking festival? in February? I thought I posted before then A LITTLE WHILE.

Brief run-down:

- went to Boston for CUPSI (College Unions Poetry Slam Invitational) as part of the UC Santa Cruz team posse; they made first but because of stupid time penalties got second.
- started my second year of college! I'm taking Jewelry-making/Metalworking, Multicultural Voices* in Gay and Lesbian Literature, World Regional Geography, Intro to Astronomy, Poetry, and Critical Thinking in Social/Cultural Issues.
- helped out at the debut of the Oversocial Mofo Revue, the new San Jose poetry slam/variety show.
- yeah my life is pretty much slam and school

* They aren't really multicultural.

SO HOW ARE YOU GUYS? I love you all so truly and deeply, and yet not enough to read almost eight months worth of backlog :'(

Tags:

i want some meaning i can memorize

at your local junes~
oh my GOOD GOLLY GRACIOUS i have been so busy.

It's the middle of the Kinetic Poetics Festival down at UCSC, and while I went down with the intention of just watching, I ended up pretty much becoming part of the crew. I'm filming tomorrow, and probably doing music.

HIGHLIGHTSCollapse )

I think I have comments from before I left that I haven't responded to, and I'm really sorry, I'll get to them ... just as soon as festival's over. Craaaaazy busy. I'm filming the finals and putting them on Youtube, so I'll link when they're up (for all of the none of you that are interesting in slam poetry).
the diary of jane

  • Tuesday was Santa Cruz slam, Wednesday was Berkeley slam, and then on Saturday I go back down to Santa Cruz until Monday for the KPP festival. Plus classes. I'm in a state of perpetual exhaustion ... but also, apparently, complete contentment. I feel like I'm finding my place ♥

  • CLASSES. What the hell. no really whatCollapse )

  • So on Saturday I saw my new psychiatrist for the first time. It was pretty uneventful — I got a prescription for Lamictal, a promise to discuss anxiety/antidepressants next appointment after I've adjusted to the Lamictal, and a list of recommended psychologists (which is really the necessary component here). He's pretty boring, honestly, but he listened to what I was saying, and that's more than I can say for the last one. He has a dog named April at the office with him, and she's a total sweetheart. ♥


  • Just. I don't know. Things are really, really good right now! And I'm kind of expecting something catastrophic to happen at any moment, but for right now I'm very tired, and very happy. Things are good.